he supposed--still had to go to work. Which was complete bollocks in his opinion, but Torchwood was always one of those 'come hell, high water, or exploding pancreas' jobs. Maybe not the exploding pancreas bit, but it wouldn't surprise him if they weren't allowed off for that.
In any event, he really didn't want to go into work, but it wasn't just work--it was a possible answer to "WHAT THE FUCKING HELL DID YOUR STUPID LITTLE ALIEN DEVICE DO TO ME THIS TIME?"
The baritone voice didn't help his situation.
For the first five minutes of his arrival to the Hub, the others believed that they had an emergency security breach. An intense interrogation followed, and then a DNA test, which--surprisingly--confirmed that he was indeed Suzie Costello.
"I'm telling you, Sydney is a very good guys name."
He shot Owen a scathing look that ended up being not nearly as effective as it used to be. "I am not
changing my name; this was probably all your fault anyway."
Toshiko glanced between them. "You did have that new bit of alien tech that you thought could be used for medical purposes yesterday," she pointed out, now the only female on the team.
"It never got near her! 'Sides, that's not what it does."
"Hey," interjected Jack with an easy smirk--it would
be easy for him, wouldn't it?--"at least you're not a kid this time. Test-driven any of the new systems?" he added with a raise of the eyebrows, followed by ducking a flying coffee mug. "At least the constant PMS hasn't changed."
"Would you mind not making a mess of things?" sighed Ianto. "It could always be worse, you know. At least you own a few more androgynous articles of clothing."
"I don't remember
my hips being quite so big," he grumbled in return. "Well, go on, do blood tests and whatever else you need to do to figure out what got me this way and fix it
Owen grabbed the vial of blood they'd taken to check his DNA. "On it."
Jack still had that insufferable smirk on his face. "Think about all the insight it'll give you. In all the stuff I've done in my life, haven't been a woman. ...Yet."
"I don't know, sir, she seems to be in the same mental state as always."
Tosh sidled up beside him. "Jack's got a point, you know. New experiences or new ways of experiencing them. I doubt Owen's going to come up with some miracle cure in half an hour; you might want to use this to your advantage." He gazed at her warily. "Think of it as a sociological and psychological experiment."
"Are they talking about sex yet?" called Owen from the medlab area, and Ianto attempted to keep another mug from hurtling across the room.